The need of having good friends

Bismillah.

Assalamualaikum wbt :)
Peace be upon you guys

How are you doing? How's your iman? Hope it's in a very good condition, insya-Allah.
Please allow me to write in English. Just want to practise my English writing skill, and maybe you too can practise your English reading skill. eheh.

I just want to share one of the things I've learnt since the last 4 months I've stayed at my campus, UiTM Alor Gajah, or it's more familiar to be called as UiTM Lendu, or it's glamorous name is UiTM London. Yes, it is about the need of having good friends.

Why do we need to have good friends? Good friends will encourage you to do good things and avoid doing bad things. These are some benefits of having good friends.

P/S: This post is a bit long. So, prepare your eyes and mind if you want to continue reading.



1. They will encourage you to go to 'majlis ilmu'

Sometimes, the campus mosque will held some talk, and every week, there will be usrah there. Not many of the students there whose school always held these kind of things. So, some of them were excited to go. and of course, with my appearance (tudung labuh, sekolah agama), they will surely expect me to go. So, usually, they ask me (yes, it's them who approached me first) to accompany them to the mosque. I will surely accept their invitation :)

Once, I felt lazy to go there because I have a test on the next day. and my close friend there felt the same as I am. eheh. Fortunately, that evening, there's someone from my class, came to my room;
Her: Aliya, hang pi dak usrah malam ni? Kalau hang nak pi, ajak aku tau.
Me: ntahla. macam malas. huhuh. awak nak pi malam ni jugak ke? esok kan ada test. minggu depan ada lagi usrah ni.
Her: Aku tak pernah pi lagi :( so aku teringin la nak pi. Nak tenangkan sikit hati ni. Dah lama tak 'terisi'.
Me: Oklah, jomlah pi :)
Her: Ok! *excited* kalau hang dah nak gerak, habaq tau.
thanks to her, me and my close friend went to the usrah that night. and we didn't ruin our test paper the next day, alhamdulillah, as we still got some time to study that night after the usrah.

this happened more than once I guess. Alhamdulillah, there must be at least one of my friends who are high-spirited to go to majlis ilmu, or when they don't have the spirit to go there, i'm the one who is high-spirited. hohoh. So, yes, we encouraged each other to go. Although we did missed some usrah sometimes ;p


2. They will ask many many many advices from you, that in the same time you're advising your friend, you're advising yourself too.

I've some friends here who have just started wearing tudung labuh. One of them is my own roommate. Sometimes when I just got to my room, she came to me and said that she couldn't stand people calling her ustazah or 'bajet alim'. She felt she's not strong enough to wear that tudung. She's not good enough to wear the tudung. (oh yeah, with the bi'ah here, students from sekolah agama have always be the reference. I believe many of you also be the reference at your place, right?). So, I advised her some. That everytime she's being patient, withstand all those saying, Allah is giving her more rewards and as time passed, she'll be strong, insya-Allah. Moreover, she's not doing anything wrong. She's just obeying Allah. She nodded some, and said, "alright. I'll become stronger." her simple 'I'll become stronger' words, somehow, gave me some strength to also be istiqamah with my own hijab :)

this is just one of the examples. There's more, such as love problems, problems with friends, problems on performing prayers, so yeah, I advised myself too as I advised them.

(يَـٰٓأَيُّہَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ لِمَ تَقُولُونَ مَا لَا تَفۡعَلُونَ (٢

'O ye who believe! Why say ye that which ye do not?'

'Wahai orang-orang yang beriman! Mengapa kamu memperkatakan apa yang kamu tidak melakukannya!'

 [61 : 2]

my usrah-mate (she's an ex-Hira') once said, don't let the ayat above prevents you from doing da'wah, but let it be the strength or catalyst for you to practise what you told people to do :)


3. Spending time with them, less wasteful and lagha things you will do.

I found that my conversations with my friends who are interested in tarbiyyah are more beneficial, and I talk less lagha things. We always discussed about people, how to do da'wah, opinions on love and marriage (hot topic. sigh), study, how to score, our experinces at school, friendship because of Allah, etc2. They made me recalling the things I've once learnt back at our beloved school.
oh and, I have this one friend who is very interested with nasheeds. So, sometimes, when I turned on my netbook and accidentally played some lagha songs (winamp, shuffle mode), she will say, 'hey, apa pagi-pagi lagi dah bukak lagu lagha.' hoho. and sometimes, she even introduced me to the nasheeds I don't know, since I usually listen to old nasyeeds more.

I like it. Because they are encouraging me to be a successful mu'minah by practising one of the characteristics, that is,

(وَٱلَّذِينَ هُمۡ عَنِ ٱللَّغۡوِ مُعۡرِضُون (٣

"And who shun vain conversation,"

"Dan mereka yang menjauhkan diri dari perbuatan dan perkataan yang sia-sia."

[23 : 3]

4. They are willing to help you anytime

I once was veeeeery nervous because I'll have my speaking test that morning and I guess I haven't practised much. My roommate noticed this and said,"meh, we practise together."
I looked at her, pushed up my left eyebrow, said, "but you have class this morning."
she said, "my class starts a bit late this morning. we still have some time."
and so, I practised with her. she also helped me being confident with myself. wuu, I'm very touched. Although it's just a short practise, at least I felt a bit more confident. alhamdulillah, I did well on the test :)

There're still some other scenes of helping but for the time being, I'll just put one.


5. Easier for you to gain more reward (pahala) by performing prayers together

Just a simple "solat jom. sama-sama." saying on our first week together, we constantly perform our prayers together for the following days and weeks and months. Alhamdulillah.
We remind each other when it's prayer time and we perform prayers together often. Alhamdulillah. We shared the doa after prayer, encouraged each other to memorize more ayat Quran and we take turns to lead the prayer. Sometimes we even recite the Mathurat together. and yes, I can say that they too, are my catalyst to be committed with Al-Mathurat daily.


6. They will remind you whenever you've done something wrong, or whenever you want to do something wrong.

I remember one of my friends suggested to me to wear her shawls (which are, short). then, the other friend came and said, 'Aliya, don't. stay with this tudung of yours'. I smiled. Insya-Allah. The other friend who just came, she's just wearing a casual tudung bawal and shawls sometimes. I hope that Allah would open her heart to cover her aurat more properly. Amin.

Another scene, when I did some joke that I thought wouldn't harm anyone, but it actually did. one of my friends came near to me. She said, 'that's not good. that's not funny. that's pitiful.'
fuh, pedih, menusuk! Allah reminded me through my friend on the spot. That's a good thing.


7. They are the catalyst to make you study more whenever you felt lazy

Good thing that most TESLians including my roommates are hardworking, so have the characteristics of a future teacher, they encouraged me to be hardworking too. Often they ask me about homework, then ask me to do it together. Often they invite me to do a studygroup with them. Alhamdulillah.

and Alhamdulillah sangat sangat, during finals, on every night before each papers, there must be at least a friend came to my room and said, 'let's study together!' or 'ajar aku yang ni!' or 'pinjam internet. nak search pasal *blablabla*' and even brought pass year questions with her/them. Automatically, I'll feel encouraged to study.

heh. I want to be hardworking in my campus life. Allah sent me hardworking people here ;)

.:========================:.

Of course, there are still a lot more benefits of having good friends. but these are some that I could find out based on my personal experience. I hope that Allah will bless our friendship at let our friendship stays till the hereafter. All of them are good. but only few of them really understand the concept of ukhuwah fillah.

You guys know better about ukhuwwah fillah right. So, it's our duty to spread the ukhuwwah fillah concept among our new circles of friends :)

Before I end this post, I'd like to remind all of you, and myself too, let us find good friends, and be a good friend. If you think none of your friends are good, still, be a good friend, and let the good sides of yours influence your friends. Don't ever let their bad side influence you.
and please believe, that, if you want to be good, Allah will definitely send good people to you. Don't be afraid nor ashamed to approach good people. and, just be yourself. your good-sided self lah.

alright. I think that's all. sorry for the long post.
thanks and congratulations to whoever finished reading this post. hoho.

wassalam :)

Aliya Khair

Asasi TESL '11/'12

UiTM London